I have been working PFT at my job, which pretty much is a fancy word for someone who mainly works the warehouse. I have to get up at 5:30 tomorrow, i don't do well in the mornings. So far i seem to be having fun with it. I like not having to sell as much in the store. And all the guys i work with are pretty cool.
Not to jump to another subject but i hate one someone says one thing and either doesn't do that or does something completely different. I just am bothered by people who play with my head. I know that we all in someway have messed with someone. I understand that we are all not perfect but I have been waiting for some kind of honest being to come in my life. I feel like I have met a few. Only a few. I am trying to get over the fact that people are people not perfect.
And by all means I know that I am not perfect. I hate myself all the time for my lying habits, whether it is "does this make me look fat" to "do you like what i got u", of course I have lied. We all have to lie. That makes us normal. Now I know i am going to get people saying "i don't lie" or "i am honest to everyone", but please give me a break. Whether it is a little white lie or a huge, crazy, world ending lie. We all have done it. I don't want to be put up on a cross and pointed at just because I have made mistakes in my past. I know that I have, and probably will again. I can't promise to never lie. That is like saying " I promise to never walk" or "I promise to never talk". I understand that to be honest is the best policy. I am tired of feeling guilty. Things happen. Get over it. People lie. Get over it.
Stop making me feel bad for lying. I understand. I got it. People need to just move on and try to pick up the pieces where they lie and try. Whether it is to fix it or let it die. I am not one for letting things die but I am trying to be a better person. And I don't understand why some people get some weird pleasure from making others suffer. I have put people threw difficult times, and I understand that it is karma for me to go through the same. I am tired of it. So I am going to get over it. Over my sadness. Over my pain of people just trying to tear others down.
I know that I went from people lying to talking about people tearing me down. If I don't get all this out it is going to make me mad.
Thanks for listening to me rant on and on. I think it is the tacos that are making me talk so much.